Complain...Complain...

I love the Singapore Complaints Choir. They were supposed to perform this song during the M1 Fringe Festival. Unfortunately, the ang mohs were banned from singing it and performance had to be private... The conductor was specially flown in from Finland! WTF! The ang mohs must be thrilled...*rolls eyes*



Lyrics below...

We get fined for almost anything
Drivers won't give chance when you want to change lane
The indoors are cold, the outdoors are hot;
And the humid air, it wrecks my hair
Those answering machines always make you holdOnly to hang up on you
When a pregnant lady gets on the train
Everyone pretends to be asleep
I'm stuck with my parents till I'm 35
Cause I can't apply for HDB
We don't recycle any plastic bags
But we purify our pee
*chorus:
What's wrong with Singapore?
Losing always makes me feel so sore
Cause if you're not the best
Then you're just one of the rest
My oh my Singapore
What exactly are we voting for?
What's not expressly permittedis prohibited........
"Ooh"
When I'm hungry at the food court, I see
People chope seats with their tissue paper
To the auntie staying upstairs:Your laundry's dripping on my bed sheets
Please don't squat on the toilet seats
And don't clip your nails on MRT
Stray cats get into noisy affairs
At night my neighbor makes weird animal sounds
People put on fake accents to sound posh
And queue up 3 hours for donuts
Will I ever live till eighty fiveto collect CPF?
*chorus
Singaporeans too kiasu! (so scared to lose)
Singaporeans too kiasi! (so scared to die)
Singaporeans too kiabor! (scared of their wives)
Maybe we’re just too stressed out! (even the kids)
"Ooh"
Old National Library was replaced by an ugly tunnel
Singaporean men can’t take independent women
People blow their nose into the swimming pool (and pee too)
And fall asleep on my shoulder in the train
Singapore’s national bird is the crane (the one with yellow steel girders)
Real estate agents’ leaflets clogging up my mailbox (en bloc, en bloc, en bloc, en bloc)
Why can’t we be buried when we die?
No one wants to climb Bukit Timah with me
*chorus
There are not enough public holidays
My neighbor sings KTV all night
Wedding dinners never start on time
My hair is always cut shorter than I want
Channel 5 commercials are way too long
Why do men turn bald?
At first it was to speak more mandarin
Then it was to speak proper English
What’s wrong with my powderful Singlish?
People sit down during rock concerts
We have to pay for tap water at restaurants
ERP gantries are everywhere
But I can still see traffic jams on the road
All the bus stops have tilted benches
Cannot access playboy.com
*chorus

Shoes!

Why are my kinda shoes only available in the U.S.? *devastated*

More here...and here...and here...and here...and here...

Am tempted to buy all!!! *grabs hair with hands and pulls hard*

Sleep beckons...

Love

When I was growing up, I learnt that even the one person that wasn't supposed to let me down probably will. I have had my heart broken more than once and it gets harder every time. I've blamed my new love for the things an old one did. I've cried because time was passing by too fast and I was about to lose someone I love. I tried to learn to love like I've never been hurt but failed miserably. Love is giving him the power to destroy me, but trusting him not to. Whenever someone betrays that trust, a part of me dies. And it takes an awful long time to heal. I've died several times, yet never healed enough. One of life's greatest challenge is to find someone who knows all your flaws, differences and mistakes, yet still love you with everything he has. I almost gave up. Then I met him.
He doesn't quote poetry. He doesn't shower me with flowers. He doesn't think about me every moment. He's made me cry. But he has given me a part of him that he knows I can break. We have our differences. He only eats the yellow and green coloured Skittles while I only dig the red and purple ones. We share the orange. He loves salt and vinegar chips while I hate them. But we both love sour cream and onion. While he yearns for freedom and gives it to me in abundance, I'm insecure and possessive. He puts up with my shit just as I do with his. He's changed for me, just as I've done for him. We've cried for and with each other. We've hurt and been hurt. We've been through so much and have come so far. Only because we want us to work. Ask me how much I want it. I'll tell you more than anything in the world. Ask me how much I love him. I'll say to bits, but I know I can love him more. There is so much more I can and am willing to give. Time will tell.
He's not perfect because he's only human. That is why I love him with everything I have. And I love him more each day. He's made me smile more than I've ever had. He's healed some of my old scars. And he's showered me with love and bliss.
Love is only a chapter in a man's life, but to a woman, it is an entire book. I hope I'm only halfway through my book.


"It is better to lose your pride with someone you love rather than to lose that someone you love with your useless pride."

"It is not the lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages."

"If I hadn’t met you, I wouldn’t like you. If I didn’t like you, I wouldn’t love you. If I didn’t love you, I wouldn’t miss you. But I did, I do, and I will."

"If you are not big enough to lose, you are not big enough to win."

Tapas and good times...

last day of Jan 08!

mustard smothered pork slices are yummy!! hell even prawns and clams tasted good ... and i'm not even a fan of seafood .. Singapore needs more tapas bars .. the do dish out decent stuff at Bungalow.. then again even the worst of food taste good when in the company of my bee ... 3 years 6 months and 31 days and counting .. and everything still seems so fresh .. so new ... i'm excited about the future... i look back on the past and realise we've achieved so far, how we've grown together.. yes, we will be psychic one day i believe. as for me right now, i can't remember being more happy than i am right now... life is good coz i've got you to share it with.. my bee, my evil twin, my other half.

KOALA!

ahahahah... is this why? ...as per our friends at wiki:

The word koala comes from Dharuk gula. Although the vowel /u/ was originally written in the Latin alphabet as "oo" (in spellings such as coola or koolah), it was changed to "oa" probably due to an error.[3] The word is erroneously said to mean "doesn't drink"

hehe.. that kinda explains alot ... anyway couldn't help but add this in

<<------------------ man i wish i could do that ..

here's another one .. not quite as fuzzy but one that's definately special ... --------------------->>

lazy sundays....

awww... my bee's real sweet... *thumbs up* for her helping me post up them music vids .. (even though she doesn't like 'never tear us apart' ... bleh) ..still love her to bits...

FINALLY finished up my bloody tourism assignment.. such a fuckin' relief. It was dogging me the whole week, kinda felt like a mega-wedgie stuck on you and your hands were tied up.i feel soooooooooooo much betta now..

my bee was real quick in getting hers done... even exceeded the word requirement ...easy!
WiS-PECT! *thumps chest with fist*

well that's my bee ... my evil twin....

thinking of what's on the menu for dinner... speaking of food if anybody knows how to get pasta aglio olio right pls lemmie know ... with my lack of focus and over-enthusiasm on wanting to show-off the 'J. Oliver' trick of placing raw pasta into a pot, i've actually managed to BURN pasta ... bravo to me ... :(

Nobody

The universe is vast beyond our imagination. We, mere mortals, are nothing more than microscopic planktons living in it. Utterly insignificant. The world does not revolve around one person, nor does it revolve around any particular group of people. We are all nobodies. Many are dying as we speak, others are born. Celebrities are also mere mortals. Insignificant. No one cares whether one lives or dies. It is only when you find that special someone, who matters the most to you, and you to him/ her, that you become significant and important. When that happens, your world revolves around him/ her, and his/ her around you. And the two people evolves into one. Sure, there will be times when each will be engaging in separate activities. But one knows that at the end of the day, someone cares. And there is something to look forward to. One will still be insignificant to the rest of the world. Friendship is but a myth. I'd like to refer to friendship as companionship. Do you not rather spend time with your special someone, than with your "friends" (a.k.a. companions)? Of course, you will still want some time away from that special someone, to be with your companions. Just some. Do you not have "friends" who suddenly do the disappearing act when they get hitched? I do. I don't blame them. Because I am guilty of that myself. And why so? Because I believe I am just as insignificant to them as they are to me. Without my evil twin, I am nobody.

Muse Music

My evil twin insists that Muse is one of those rare bands that are even better when they play live. So I checked them out at YouTube. Look what I found!



And



Oh well, what can I say? This is for my evil twin.

Shopping @ IKEA

Oooooooh! I love shopping at IKEA.

Yay! New bed sheets, new pillow, new tea lights...

And the meatballs and kan tang were delicious! My evil twin needs to learn how to cook those for me...*hint hint*

As expected, mummy was all smiles when I showed her my new ang gong gong bed sheets. But my moment of triump was short-lived. She started nagging about spring cleaning, throwing away my old PC, unwanted books... A wave of dejection washed over me as I drowned out her rants with my own thoughts...

Lalaland beckons...

Taxi Fares

Once again, I feel the desire to rant here at such an odd hour. Call me a freak. But I need to somehow document my thoughts right now.

I was prolly the last to know about the hike in taxi fares. That fateful day a month ago, the first day the rates went up, I did my usual, called for a cab and happily hopped in to go meet Bee. The taxi driver was exceptionally chirpy and friendly towards the unsuspecting me. During the cab ride, he attempted to strike up a conversation.

Cabby Uncle: "Aiyah, I really don't know how the new pricing works. You can explain to me?"

Me: "Huh?" followed by blank look.

Cabby Uncle: "Eh? You don't know ah?"

He then fished out a letter from his dash board and handed it over to me. Then, he started babbling non-stop. All I heard was a mosquito-like buzz from him, while I digested the contents of the letter. I remember reading key words like "35%", "CBD", "peak hour surcharge". WTF!

Cabby Uncle: "Young lady, this was announced long long ago leh! You mean you never read the news ah? Thought you know, then I can ask you to explain to me how this new pricing works leh..."

Me: "Sorry uncle, I don't read newspapers. But from the looks of this letter, I believe it says......."

Can't remember what I said to him, but I recall him grinning away like a squirrel who finally went to heaven and found the biggest nut he'd ever seen. Then he went on to stroke my friggin ego by telling me how pretty and young I look. I shudder whenever I recall this scene, as he somehow reminds me of a greasy Canon copier salesman I know.

Ok, that last part was irrelevant... Back to taxi fares...

An article in Today (http://www.todayonline.com/articles/233670.asp) said we are having better waiting times and higher cab takings. Is it all an attempt on taxi companies' part to make more money from us consumers? Demand and supply. If demand drops, suppliers may have to revise their prices to attract more business. I doubt that'll happen, with regular cab-takers like me, who simply cannot muster enough courage to battle the hot sun and walk to the bus-stop. Seriously, with inflation so rampant this year, I need to rethink my spending patterns.

speaking of inxs...

rare vid of mike doing 'tear us apart' live ....



yes he looks like he hasn't washed his hair in decades and he's wearing grey jammies.. but this gave me goosebumps ...

Note: Posting on behalf of my evil twin

shiny stuff..

look at em' nice n slender fingers.. yummie... *slurps & licks*

'doncha wish yr fingers were hot like me.. doncha'

rant rant rant:

it's DON'T YOU for godsakes.. what is wrong with WIT-CHOO all? hahaha...

my bee's fingers.. luv em.. meow

random rants on a well-fed Tuesday night..

DINNER!

evil twin's mum cooks a mean dinner... pork, potatoes, dark soy = yummy .. damn i could finish a whole plate of it .. in fact i did ! wahahahahaa....

MOB(oring)ILE PHONES

mobile phones now are booooooring.. nothing new.. nothing interesting...

u-n-i-n-s-p-i-r-e-d !

yeah, connecting people? BLAH! we need something new, something fresh.. how about mobile phone that has a slider that reveals... a WASHING MACHINE!?! .. or my personal fav, a clamshell phone that doubles as a garlic/onion mincer. HELL YEAH! whatcha think bee?



well the blackberry 9000 rumour created a little stir, until we saw the pic.. http://www.alleyinsider.com/2008/01/rims-secret-iphone-killer-delayed-rimm.html

it looks like it was drawn by a 12 year old using microsoft paint *de-dong de dong*



THE JOKER IS DEAD

R.I.P Heath Ledger

from teenybopping-"10 things" to spandex-wearing-knight to butty-cowboy to the joker.. u know what? with all respect to the Heath fans out there 'The Dark Knight' was going to be a sure hit, but with his death it's probably going to be the smash hit of the year. Just thinking back to Brandon's 'The Crow' and seeing how it made a 'hmmm not too bad' movie into an iconic one of the 90's..

joining a list of ozzies i wish was still alive.. michael hutchence, steve croc dude irwin and now heath... he beat out Robin Williams & Adrien Brody to play the part of the oh-so-fucking cool joker.. nuff said ... heath was 28 years old ...
http://imdb.com/gallery/ss/0468569/Ss/0468569/05556.jpg.html?hint=group <-- joker in a trailer shot

The Android Platform

This means there is no such thing as a gphone. But I still want that phone he's using!!!

After-Hours Thoughts

Pandan flavoured bread spread with a generous helping of butter is the most heavenly thing right this moment. And I am busy chomping away. Then it suddenly dawned upon me that I have not had a cigarette for the past 2 hours. Geez, now I cannot wait to gobble down my not-so-heavenly-anymore bread and light myself a stick.

Am oh-so tempted to do some online shopping. Yet, I cannot bring myself to purchase something I have yet to touch. And of course, knowing my very unusual size... Yes, I like to touch and feel stuff before I buy them. Came across some blogs on shoes that really blew me away with their write ups on jimmy choos and louboutins.

Want a tee with Andy Warhol inspired prints! Doubt Singapore has any. Saw some on an online store. I am sure they won't fit! *sulk*

I must make it a point to drop by Haji Lane some time soon. Just found out it may be a treasure cove! I am so out-dated...

It's so quiet. Not even the sound of crickets. Hope no bugs bug me this time! Pun totally intended! Still not a word done on my assignment. I admit, I'm lazy. And I shall procrastinate for as long as I can. Shall try to start on it tomorrow. Or perhaps the day after.

Heroes is still on hold due to writers' strike. Sigh... when will it end? I need my Heroes fix.



To-do this weekend: Try stir frying some kang kong with cut chili padi and chopped garlic.

Delirium

Cigarettes and coffee at this time. This is completely insane! An irritating bug in the room is driving me nuts. I shall kill it! TV blaring away. Fat and ugly woman in yellow fiddling with plants. I hate yellow. At least for now. Maybe it is time for bed. I shall dream of strategic tourism planning and miraculously write a 3,000 word assignment when I wake!

I Did It!!!

New banner for the blog. Hope my evil twin does not find it too girly. If he does, I have others as back up!

stark-raving-mad-chef-wannabe

• 
  
  onions are nice but garlic is king


• 
  
  Maggie sauce is happiness in a bottle


• 
  
  why can't i get aglio olio right?


• 
  
  mushrooms feel funny but are yummy


• 
  
  I keep forgetting salt


• 
  
  I keep adding too much Maggie sauce


• 
  
  chopping onions are therapeutic


• 
  
  I should be sleeping


• 
  
  meow

The Formation of The Evil Twins Inc.

My bee is brilliant!

Salty pasta & psychic waiters, lucky enough to escape the ever frightful 'give the chef a crap', strolling on windy nights at a place that once was, death of a Sultan..oh-na-oh-na-ee-eh-na....

{lookin' fantastic in blue-black undertones with red streaks X 3, is bee}

koala!